4-1 The Boxer
拳擊手
若擔任起教導弟子眾的責任後,阿姜曼便會定期舉行集會,在集會中開示法義並解答弟子們的疑惑。倘若有弟子行為不檢或心態不端正,阿姜曼會在會中公開責備之。進入禪定後,弟子們的不當行為,可能是以影像的形式呈現到阿姜曼的禪境;或者,阿姜曼是直接在腦海中讀到弟子們的心思。知道弟子的錯誤後,阿姜曼會想出一些善巧方法,讓犯錯者能夠注意到自己的疏失,避免疏失在未來又再次發生。
在禪定中出現的視覺徵兆,會依犯錯者的狀況而有所差異。接下來,我將敘述一位比丘的親身經歷,這位比丘在出家前曾是一位出名的拳擊手。我相信看過這故事後,讀者們便能夠一窺阿姜曼徵兆的奇妙之處了。
在拳界闖蕩多年後,這名拳手看出世間生活之空虛,他毅然決然地放棄了拳擊生涯。對正法的信心於心中萌芽,於是他剔除鬚髮,出家學道。除此之外,他更決心遵循森林頭陀比丘的修行之道。得知阿姜曼是一位優秀且值得尊敬的導師後,這名比丘便離開家鄉出外尋找阿姜曼。但出發前,這比丘並未考慮清楚什麼該帶、什麼不該攜帶,他在行囊裡多放了十張不同拳擊姿勢的照片。他帶著行囊與照片,徒步由曼谷走到清邁的山區。歷經種種艱辛後,這名比丘終於在荒野中找到阿姜曼,他向阿姜曼頂禮並說明來意。皇天不負有心人,阿姜曼同意讓這名比丘加入僧團。
那天夜裡,阿姜曼一定使用神通檢視了這名比丘。因為在隔天一早,所有比丘整好隊、準備出外托缽時,阿姜曼一到場就訓斥起這位新來的比丘:
「他昨天來到這裡,向我們表明了他學習佛法的決心。由他昨天的言行舉止,我看不出來有任何不妥,他應該是一位值得讚許的比丘,但為何昨晚他會有那麼糟糕的行為呢?我在禪坐時,他直接進入了我的禪境,人就站在我前方幾呎之遙。然後,他擺出各種拳擊姿勢,接著慢慢地後退。當影像逐漸消失時,我仍看得到他在練習泰拳-右邊踢出一腳,接著左邊一腳3。他的身上有什麼秘密呢?出家前他是一名拳手嗎?那就是他對我展示全套拳擊動作的原因嗎?」
聽到阿姜曼的訓斥,每一位比丘都緊張地坐在原地,沒有人敢亂動,也沒有人知道阿姜曼說的是什麼情況。接著,阿姜曼將臉轉向那位已面無血色的前任拳手:
「你要為自己辯解嗎?敢做出這種行為,你到底在想什麼?幸好你沒有一拳打在我身上!」
由於當時正好是托缽時間,阿姜曼之後就不再多說什麼了。接著,阿姜曼帶隊出外托缽。晚上集會時,阿姜曼同樣也沒有提起此事。但那天晚上同樣的事情又發生了!於是,隔天一早阿姜曼再次詢問他:
「你來找我的真正目的是什麼?昨晚你又出現了,又在我禪境裡表演泰拳。你墊起腳尖,到處跳躍;一下踢擊,一下勾拳,整晚都不休息。這種行為絕不會出現在一位立志學道的行者身上。你到這裡到底有何目的?你真實的想法又是什麼?請你對我說實話,否則我必須請你離開。我從未經歷過像前兩個晚上發生的事情。」
那名比丘坐在那裡,全身不住顫抖。他的臉上全無血色,似乎就快暈倒了。另一名比丘注意到他的身體狀況,請求能先跟他說說話。
「你不要閃躲,你必須開誠佈公,將心中的想法誠實告訴阿姜曼。阿姜曼詢問的目的,只是為了找出真相,而非要傷害你。除阿姜曼之外,這裡的每一個人都不是聖者。我們仍有煩惱,也都會犯錯;因此,我們聚集在這裡,接受阿姜曼的教導與訓誡。我們都只是學生,跟隨著阿姜曼住在這裡-所以阿姜曼既是我們的老師,也是我們的父母。身為老師,他有責任責罵犯錯的弟子。老師必須時時看管學生,他的責罵或詰問不是為了別的,就只是為了我們的利益。我個人見過許多次像這樣的訓斥。有些還更加嚴厲,阿姜曼甚至是當場把犯錯者驅離。只有在犯錯比丘瞭解錯誤並接受處罰後,阿姜曼才會允許他們留在這裡繼續修行。請仔細地回想阿姜曼剛剛詢問你的事情,你不需要生起害怕的感覺。如果你回想起自己犯了什麼錯,就直接說出來。如果你覺得自己不曾做錯事,或者你想不到自己哪裡做錯,就照實告訴阿姜曼你目前想不出來。把命運交付給阿姜曼吧!讓他採取合適的處置,而你只需坦然接受。只要抱持這種信念,你的問題一定會順利解決。」
這一位比丘說完後,阿姜曼便繼續問他:「所以你要說什麼好為自己辯解呢?不是我故意要找你麻煩,但只要我閉上雙眼,我就會看到你誇張的拳擊動作,整晚都是如此!一名比丘怎麼會這樣做呢?若每晚都出現這種事,我也會感到驚訝。我必須知道你的居心為何?還是你認為我向來準確的神通,這次出了問題。是我被徵兆愚弄了才誣陷你?還是你真有問題?我要你說出實話。若事實證明我的神通出錯而你是無辜的,那麼這表示我是一名發瘋的老比丘,我不配教導任何弟子,因為我只會帶領弟子眾走向錯誤。為了後進比丘的利益,或許我必須躲在更加偏僻的地方,我絕對不能再教導別人。如果我繼續把錯誤知識傳遞給後世,那麼災難必將來臨。」
另一位比丘再次鼓勵他的朋友回答。最後,這位前泰拳拳手終於走向前答話。他以一個虛弱、且顫抖的聲音講出:「我是一位拳手」。然後,他又陷入了沉默。
阿姜曼為求確認:「你是一位泰拳拳手,對嗎?」
「對」。他只說了這個字。
「但現在你是一名比丘,你如何能同時是一名拳手呢?你是指,在前來此處的旅程中你仍依靠泰拳賺錢嗎?還是別的意思?」
這個時候,這名比丘已經害怕到腦袋整個僵住,他已無法清楚回答阿姜曼的問題了。另一位比丘趕緊幫助他恢復神智,他問他說:「你是說出家前你是一名拳手;但你現在已經不再是拳手,而是一名比丘?」
「是的。我在家時是一名拳手,但出家後,我就不再打拳了。」
阿姜曼看出他當下的狀況並不好,所以他話鋒一轉,便告訴大家現在該是托缽的時間了。阿姜曼看得出來,這名比丘因為對他的懼怕而無法清楚回答問題。阿姜曼於是要另一位比丘之後再私下問他。用完餐後,另一位比丘找到機會與他私下談話。他發現,這位新來的比丘以前住在蘇安庫拉拳擊學校。他曾是一位相當出名的拳手,但在看清世俗生活的虛幻後,他受戒成為比丘,並出發找尋阿姜曼。
知道此比丘的來歷後,他便立刻向阿姜曼報告,阿姜曼對此倒是沒有表達什麼看法。在當晚的集會,阿姜曼也再次與那位前拳手談過話,於是大家都認為這次的事件應該就此結束了。然而,事情並非如此。那天夜晚,阿姜曼再一次對此事進行調查。隔天早上,他又在大眾前詢問那位前拳手。
「不僅是你曾經打過拳而已,一定還有別的事情隱藏在裡面。你應該要好好思索整個事件。若它僅僅是因為你出家前曾經是一名拳手,那麼這個問題理應不存在了,沒道理它會反覆出現。」
那早,阿姜曼就只說了這些話而已。
稍後,那位與前拳手說過話的比丘再一次找他談談。聊得更深入後,他發現這名新來的比丘竟然擁有十張拳擊姿勢的照片!仔細思惟後,他的朋友相信這些照片應該就是所有問題的源頭。於是,他勸他的朋友要嘛就丟掉這些照片、不然就是把它們燒掉。他的朋友同意了這項提議,兩人便一起燒掉了照片。神奇的是,在照片燒掉後,事件就不再發生了。
這名前拳手在修行上極為精勤,他時時刻刻都能注意自己的言行舉止。這個事件結束後,他便安心地留在僧團裡跟隨阿姜曼修行。阿姜曼也相當看重他,不再過問起他的過往。
時間更久後的某一天,同修們一起拿這個事件取笑這名比丘。說到自己被阿姜曼訓斥時,他說:「我那時真是嚇得快要死掉了!我根本搞不清什麼是什麼,所以我只能像個笨蛋一樣答話。」說到那位幫助他的比丘時,他說:「若不是你好心幫助我,或許我當場就會瘋掉。同時,幸好阿姜曼是一位大智者,看到我快失去理智,他就立刻停止不再繼續問話,於是我才能夠撐下去。」
以上就是阿姜曼坐禪時發生過的視覺徵兆的一個例子。阿姜曼經常使用這些從徵兆得到的訊息來教導弟子們-這項工具的重要性完全不亞於他心通4。
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在清邁時期,阿姜曼對神通已徹底精熟,於是他與外在世界有著更頻繁、更多類別的接觸與感應。有些現象完全發生在他的內心,而有些則存在於他周遭的空間。這些現象帶來了各種令人無法想像的觀點-許多連阿姜曼都不禁感到大開眼界。尤其是獨自一人生活時,阿姜曼更經歷了猶如萬花筒般的各種現象,數量多到無法一一記載。若心處於「能知」的狀態下,資訊與理解便會持續生起:行者能夠在日常生活裡獲得體悟,更能夠在禪修時獲得資訊與體悟。這真是奇怪,因為未訓練的心既自大又盲目;但同樣是心,一顆安靜的心卻有著覺察各種事件與現象的能力。許多人都有類似的經驗,只要心安靜下來,你便能覺察到許多早已存在的事件與訊息。也是直到那時候,你才會恍然大悟它們一直都在我們的眼前啊!
只有在進入完全寧靜的狀態時,心「能知」的功能才會停止下來。這是深層禪定,它能夠擋下所有的現象,可確保心不受任何事物之干擾。當「心」如此依尋「法」停息時,心與法便融合了-心即是法,法即是心。在此狀態下,心與法無二無別,它們是一體的,不再有任何的二元對立,世俗間相對性事實的判定標準粉碎了:在此狀態,時間與空間不復存在,沒有身體也沒有心,痛苦與喜樂皆不會生起。只要心不退出,心就可以持續維持在深層禪定中-哪怕是幾天、幾月、幾年、甚至是數劫之久!包含無常、苦、無我等等的世俗實相都無法打亂此境界,它是所有二元對立性完全停止的狀態。舉例來說,若行者在心進入滅盡定(nirodhadhamma)時,肉身遭逢意外而死亡,但行者不會知道肉身已死,心仍會在禪定中。因為心已靜止在「滅盡」之中-一切因緣生起法都會停息5。
事實上,緣起緣滅法皆停息、或說「世俗相對實相皆消融」的狀態只是暫時的-要經年累月維持此禪定幾乎是做不到的事。滅盡定可比擬為一種完全無夢且極度深層的睡眠。在深睡期間,入睡者覺知不到他的身體或內心。只要持續維持在深層睡眠,入睡者就不會改變他無覺知的狀態;等到漸漸醒來時,正常的感官覺知才會再度進入意識。
然而,包含「滅盡定」在內的深層禪定,它們都是世間禪定,它們都存在相對實相的範疇內。只有「絕對自由」之心才完全脫離了世俗相對實相。自由心若進入禪定,自由心不會受到世俗四禪八定、或九次第定等等禪定的影響。它始終是自由之心,不會受到時間與空間的侷限-這即是法的無時性(akaliko)。
世人不可能理解或揣摩出自由心的本質,任何推論與猜測都只是白費工夫而已。另外,自由心進入滅盡定時,心會放下所有世俗概念,並就此停止運作-所有依緣而生的現象都會一起消失。只在心從深層禪定退回至近行定、或完全退出禪定時,聖者的自由心才會恢復正常運作,接收或處理它認為適合的感官資訊6。
不論是在近行定、或在一般狀態下,阿姜曼的心總是能夠覺知到各式各樣的現象,差異只在覺知的深度與廣度。若要徹底探究某件事物,阿姜曼會進入近行定,因為這程度的禪定能夠得到更多面向的資訊。舉例來說,天眼通與天耳通必須在近行定的狀態下才能施展。在近行定中,具有天眼、天耳的行者能夠覺知到他所要觀察對象的訊息。不只是外貌或聲音而已,行者還可觀察到許多更加細微的事項。雖然天眼天耳被人們稱之為神通,聽起來似乎是不可思議,但其實這兩項神通就類似人們用眼睛去看、用耳朵去聽,大概就是如此而已。
3. 在泰式拳擊中,拳手可以使用拳、腳、膝蓋、與手肘去攻擊對手。
4. 阿姜曼會運用徵兆或他心通作為教導學生之輔助工具,這兩項工具都有很好的教學效果。
5. 這段文字提到了「滅盡定」,也可稱為「滅受想定」。在所有禪定中,這是最高且最深層的禪定。依緣而生滅的所有事物,即是世俗的相對實相(sammuti)。而所有依緣生滅的事物必然具有無常、苦、與無我的性質,可說所有事物的本質就是無常、苦、與無我。進入滅盡定後,包含五蘊等的各種依緣生起的現象都暫時不會在行者的心中生起。
6. 阿羅漢已完全超脫了所有世俗的相對實相,所以自由之心與絕對純淨之心即是阿羅漢的同義詞。
When Ãcariya Mun accepted a group of monks as his students, he held regular meetings where he instructed them in the way of practice. If he noticed that a monk’s attitude was unbecoming, or his behavior offensive, he took the opportunity to openly rebuke him. While in meditation, knowledge about the unseemly behavior of his students might arise in his mind as visual images, or else he might psychically read their errant thoughts. He then devised some cunning method to bring this to the culprit’s attention, assuring that greater care and restraint was exercised in the future.
The visual nimittas that arose in Ãcariya Mun’s citta during meditation varied according to the overall situation of the person who was the principal cause of that vision. To give you an idea of the nature and the scope of his nimittas, there is the story of the monk who was a rather famous boxer as a layman. Giving up his profession to ordain as a monk, he developed a strong faith and decided to practice kammaååhãna. Aware of Ãcariya Mun’s excellent reputation as a revered meditation master, he set out to find the place where Ãcariya Mun was staying. But as he set off, he unwittingly carried in his bag ten pictures of boxers in various boxing poses. With these photos, he traveled from Bangkok to Chiang Mai, searching for Ãcariya Mun in that mountainous region. Finally arriving at Ãcariya Mun’s wilderness retreat, he paid his respects and explained his reasons for coming. Ãcariya Mun accepted him without offering any comments.
During the night Ãcariya Mun must have thoroughly investigated this monk; for, the following morning, when all the monks gathered to eat, he came in and immediately began speaking about the new arrival.
“This monk came here for the express purpose of learning about Dhamma. Looking at his behavior, I can find nothing offensive – it’s commendable. Why then did he exhibit such dreadful conduct last night? As I sat in meditation, he approached and stood right in front of me, just a few feet away. He then proceeded at some length to assume various boxing poses, before gradually backing away. As he slowly faded from my view, he continued to shadow box, kicking first right and then left as he went.3 What’s the story with this monk? Was he a boxer before he ordained as a monk? Is that the reason he gave me a lengthy boxing exhibition?”
While he spoke, all the monks, including the former boxer, sat motionless in bewildered silence. Ãcariya Mun turned to the former boxer, whose face had gone pale.
“What do you have to say for yourself? What did you have in mind, behaving in such a manner? At least you didn’t take a punch at me!”
As it was time to go on almsround, Ãcariya Mun said nothing more that morning. Nor did he bring the matter up later, when instructing the monks at the evening meeting. But during the night he was again confronted with the same problem. So, he brought it up again the following morning.
“What’s your real purpose for coming to me? Last night, there you were again, displaying your boxing skills, jumping and kicking all over the place. It lasted nearly all night. Such behavior is not normal for someone whose intentions are noble. What did you have in mind before you came to see me? And what are your thoughts now that you are here? Please tell me the truth, or else I won’t be able to let you stay on here. I’ve never experienced anything quite like the events of the last two nights.”
The monk sat trembling, his face ashen, as though he was ready to faint. One of the other monks, noticing his worsening condition, requested an opportunity to speak privately with him.
“Please be forthcoming and tell Ãcariya Mun your true feelings about this matter. He’s asking you about it only because he wants to ascertain the truth, not because he has any intention to hurt you. None of us, who are living here with him, are saints, free of kilesas. We are bound to make mistakes and so must accept his admonitions. All of us live here as his disciples. Being our teacher, he’s like a father and a mother to us. As a teacher, he has an obligation to reprimand anyone who does something noticeably wrong. A teacher must keep an eye on his students – for their own sake, educating them by questioning and criticizing them as circumstances require. I myself have been subjected to many such castigations; some even more severe than the one you received. Ãcariya Mun has even ordered some monks to leave the premises immediately, only to relent and allow them to stay on when they realized their faults and accepted the blame. Please think carefully about what he just said to you. My own feeling is that you shouldn’t be unreasonably afraid. If you have anything on your mind, just express it truthfully. If you feel you have done nothing wrong, or you cannot recall where you made a mistake, tell him straight out that you cannot seem to recollect your past errors. Then put your fate in his hands, letting him take what action he sees fit, and accept the consequences. The matter will then resolve itself.”
When the other monk finished speaking Ãcariya Mun continued: “So what do you have to say for yourself? It’s not that I want to find fault with you for no good reason. But as soon as I close my eyes I have to watch your antics blocking my view for the rest of the night. Why would a monk behave like that? It dismays me to see it every night. I want to know what kind of sinister motives you may have for persisting in such conduct. Or do you think that my own intuition, which has always been reliable in the past, is now playing tricks on me, and contaminating you in the process? I want you to tell me the truth. If it turns out that you’re innocent, my intuition being at fault, then that means I’m just a crazy old monk who doesn’t deserve to live with a group of students like this – I will only lead them astray. I’ll have to run off and hide myself away like some lunatic, and immediately stop teaching others. Should I persist in teaching such crazy knowledge to the world, the consequences would be disastrous.”
The other monk again encouraged his friend to speak up. Finally, the former boxer moved to answer Ãcariya Mun. In a ghostly, trembling voice, he blurted out, “I’m a boxer”, and then fell silent.
Ãcariya Mun sought confirmation: “You’re a boxer, is that right?”
“Yes.” And that was all he said.
“Right now you’re a monk; so, how can you also be a boxer? Do you mean you traveled here boxing for money along the way, or what?”
By this time, the monk’s mind was in a daze. He could offer no coherent response to Ãcariya Mun’s inquiries. The other monk took up the questioning in an effort to help him regain his mental focus: “Don’t you mean that you were a boxer in lay life, but now that you are a monk you no longer do that?”
“Yes. As a layman I was a boxer, but after ordaining as a monk I stopped boxing.”
Ãcariya Mun saw that his condition didn’t look very good, so he changed the subject, saying it was time to go on almsround. Later, he told the other monk to go and question him privately, since his fear of Ãcariya Mun prevented him from being coherent. After the meal this monk found an opportunity to put his questions in private. He discovered that the new monk had previously been a well-known boxer in the Suan Kulap boxing camp. Becoming disillusioned with lay life, he ordained as a monk and set off to find Ãcariya Mun.
Once he had the whole story, the monk related it to Ãcariya Mun, who made no further comment. It was assumed that this would be the end of the matter, especially since Ãcariya Mun spoke directly to the former boxer during the evening meeting. But that wasn’t to be the case. That night, Ãcariya Mun again investigated the matter for himself. In the morning, he confronted the former boxer once more in front of everyone.
“It’s not merely that you were once a boxer – something else is hidden there as well. You should go and carefully reconsider this whole affair. If it was simply a matter of being a boxer in lay life, the matter should have been settled by now. It should not keep recurring in this way.”
That was all he said.
Later, the monk who had become familiar with the former boxer went to see him. After further questioning he discovered that the new monk had the ten pictures of boxers in his possession. After looking at them, his friend became convinced that they were the cause of all the trouble. He advised him to either throw them away, or burn them. The boxer monk agreed, and together they burned the whole lot. After that, everything returned to normal and this matter never surfaced again.
The former boxer was diligent in his practice, always conducting himself admirably. He lived contentedly with Ãcariya Mun from then on. Ãcariya Mun was always especially kind to him – never again did he allude to his past. Afterwards, when the opportunity arose, his fellow monks teased him about that incident. Referring to his scolding from Ãcariya Mun, he said, “I was half-dead and in such a daze I didn’t know what was what, so I answered him like a half-dead idiot.” Addressing the monk who helped him, he continued, “If you hadn’t been so kind, I’d probably have gone hopelessly mad. But Ãcariya Mun was remarkably clever – as soon as he saw I was losing my wits, he quickly put a stop to the whole affair, acting as though nothing had ever happened.”
This is an example of the type of visual nimitta that might arise in Ãcariya Mun’s meditation. He regularly used the knowledge he gained from such visions to teach his students – a means no less significant than his ability to read the thoughts of others.4
ÃCARIYA MUN HAD MORE sensational experiences while living in Chiang Mai than during any other period of his life. Some of these phenomena appeared exclusively within his citta; others surfaced in the world around him. They included many amazing, stimulating insights – knowledge of a kind never occurring to him before. Living alone in particular, he encountered a myriad of mysterious phenomena far too numerous to mention. The citta in its natural state of knowing is like that: knowledge and understanding arise continuously, both during meditation and in engagement with normal daily activities. It’s strange, and truly wondrous, considering that the citta had previously been blind and ignorant, never imagining it possessed the ability to perceive the phenomena that arise each moment. It was as if such phenomena just came into being, even though they have actually existed since time immemorial.
Only when the citta enters into a state of total calm do these functions cease. All manner of phenomena are excluded from the samãdhi state, so nothing arises to affect the citta in any way. As the citta rests with Dhamma, Dhamma and the citta merge. The citta is Dhamma, Dhamma is the citta. This is a state of complete unity where the citta and Dhamma are one and the same, without any trace of duality. Conceptual reality does not exist: all concepts of time and space are transcended. There is no awareness of the body, or the mind, and concepts of pain and pleasure do not arise. As long as the citta remains there and doesn’t withdraw from that state – whether it’s for a period of days, months, years, or eons – then conventional realities such as anicca, dukkha, and anattã will not disturb it, for it is a state in which all duality ceases – entirely. If, for instance, the mundane physical body were to break up and disintegrate while the citta remained quiescent in nirodhadhamma – meaning the cessation of conventional reality – the citta in that state would be completely unaware of what was happening. 5
In truth, the state of nirodha is one in which the cessation of conceptual reality is only temporary – not lasting for years, as that is highly unlikely. It may be compared to a deep, dreamless sleep. During that time, the sleeper is completely unaware of body and mind. No matter how long he remains in deep, dreamless sleep, that condition stays the same. Only after waking up does one become aware of normal physical and mental sensations.
Deep states of samãdhi, including nirodhasamãpatti, all exist within the realm of relative, conventional reality, however. Only the vimutticitta has gone completely beyond it. And if the citta entering into these samãdhi states is already liberated from every aspect of relative, conventional reality, then that pure visuddhi-citta is in no way affected by such conventional levels of attainment. It remains vimutticitta, free from all constraints of time and space – akãliko. It’s absolutely impossible to conceptualize the nature of vimutti-citta, so any attempt to speculate about its qualities is only a waste of time and effort. The citta that enters into a state of total quiescence, free from all conceptual reality, simply ceases to function, as those conditioned phenomena – that would ordinarily be involved with the citta – temporarily disappear. Later when the citta has withdrawn from deep samãdhi into upacãra samãdhi, or back into the normal state of visuddhi-citta, it functions normally, receiving and processing sense data as it sees fit.6
Whether in upacãra samãdhi, or in its normal waking state, Ãcariya Mun’s citta was always receptive to a multitude of phenomena. The difference was in the depth, scope, and quality of the experience. If wishing to investigate something thoroughly, he would enter into upacãra samãdhi to get a more extensive view. Clairvoyance and clairaudience, for example, require a state of upacãra samãdhi. In this calm state one can perceive whatever one wishes to know about the forms and sounds of people and animals – and much, much more. Fundamentally, it’s no different from seeing with the physical eyes and hearing with the physical ears.